From Infertility to Adoption

Moms and dads describe the sometimes difficult journey to the family they were meant to have.

adoption after infertility

Choosing a new path

“Fertility treatments were very difficult for us. Our lives felt out of control, and our relationship became strained. We hated everything about the treatments, so we finally took a break to move forward with adoption. We thought we would return to fertility treatments after adopting a child, but as we held our daughter for the first time, we looked into her eyes and realized we would never again set foot in the fertility specialist’s office.”

Aiming for parenthood

“After our second failed cycle of in vitro fertilization, we ended treatment, threw out the medications, and grieved for a season. We knew it was time to make parenting our goal. Now, 15 years later, we cannot imagine our family any other way. Our three children are more wonderful and gifted than any our joint gene pool could have produced.”

Hearts and minds united

“My husband was uncomfortable with the idea of adoption, so we spent close to a year at the fertility clinic. During that time, the medications and emotional roller coaster took their toll on my heart and our marriage. But when the doctor told us that it was unlikely I would get pregnant without more invasive methods, we realized that we wanted to be parents, not just to get pregnant. I started interviewing adoption agencies the next day.”

Obsessed with pregnancy

“Years of infertility left us brokenhearted. We were so obsessed with getting pregnant that we’d forgotten that we really wanted to be parents. Finally, we went to a seminar on international adoption, and were so inspired by the stories we heard that we started our home study almost immediately. A few months later, we received a video of a little boy crawling and playing with toys, and accepted the referral. Just a few months later, we arrived home with our son.”

Fostering love

“My husband and I decided to become foster parents before starting our permanent family. We were blessed with two little boys for our first placement. We adopted them when the prospect of their moving to another home broke our hearts. After they settled in, we tried to have a biological child. To our surprise, we both turned out to have fertility problems. When the staff started explaining the daily fertility shots, we saw no reason to pursue biological parenthood.”

In the family

“My husband and I waited eight years before trying to have kids. We hadn’t expected to have difficulty conceiving. Once we realized we wouldn’t be able to get pregnant without fertility treatments, however, we jumped right into adoption. There are many adoptive parents and children among our family and friends. We’re actually the third generation in my husband’s family to adopt, and we are very proud of that. So it was a comfortable decision for us to make.”

The answer to our prayers

“After four years of fertility treatments, a friend recommended that we attend an adoption seminar. My husband and I weren’t open to adoption, but we decided to go. The hour-and-a-half seminar changed our lives forever. On the ride home, my husband said that he thought adoption was the answer to our prayers, and I agreed. We immediately started paying off bills, filling out paperwork, and preparing our home for a child. Watching our son grow has been an amazing experience. We have never regretted our decision to veer off the fertility path.”

Everything you need to know about the adoption process, delivered monthly to your inbox.